Why is it as people we try so very hard to impress others? What does it really accomplish? Anything? Does it actually help? I've been thinking about this a lot lately.
At work we always want to impress our bosses and coworkers about how well we can do, and how much we can take on. At school we try to suck up to teachers and show them that we're trying to understand and learn the material. When it comes to families, we try to show them we're doing our absolute best at everything we are involved in, and that we also care what goes on in their lives as well. Then when we search for a mate, date, or significant other we also hide who we are for a few days in order to reel them in and keep them around....but what's the point of all this? We know how well we do in the sections of our lives that we are most interested and focused on, why do we have to prove to others that we know what we're doing is correct and appropriate?
Girls constantly try to look their best, act appropriately, and do just about anything for any guy; even if it means changing, or "improving," ourselves to better fit what a guy wants in a woman. I just don't understand it sometimes. There's so much pressure on women to look a certain way, act a certain way, like certain things, do well at other things...it's just not possible! Not all women can cook, clean, or look their best at all times. Some women are great chemists, some are amazing cooks, some are talented musicians, others are unanimously gorgeous, and all other ladies have different talents. Why must we be good at all the stereotypical things?
I myself haven't had much practice in cooking or baking, but I'm learning, mostly because I want to learn. Baking is one of my favorite things to do, and comes easily to me, but cooking is on the other side of the spectrum. Laundry. THAT, I am pretty good at because my mother taught me, and I like things being orderly, neat, and tidy. I can be a messy person, that's for sure; however, I need floors and cabinets free of clutter. I would like to say I'm attractive, but of course not everyone is going to think so. And I'm happy about that! Everyone is different, and I appreciate the variety of people's interests. Every single woman is different though. My best friend for example...she's gorgeous, a fabulous cook, keeps things about as clean and tidy as I do, and also has various other specialties. Sure, there's things she's not the greatest at, but not everyone can be good at everything there is to do. I really can't think of anything she's not good at though...maybe spontaneous combustion of vocabulary? Hahahaha, yes. That is the only thing I can think of. But I love her for everything she is, and everything she is not. Shouldn't we all feel that way? Just screw what people think about us, and just live our lives the way we see fit?
I think so.
Impressions can be helpful and deathly all at once, but sometimes we just need to take the time to say our own "FUCK YOU's" and enjoy the moment.
Have a good night, ladies and gents. :)
Thursday, February 16, 2012
Thursday, February 9, 2012
This is me...in recent times.
I kind of got too involved with my first blog to realize I didn't tell everyone about myself. Obviously you bloggers out there don't all know me! My name is Kayla. I grew up in Fayetteville, North Carolina, and I never dreamed of going anywhere else. However, about a year and a half ago my boyfriend decided he wanted to move back to Phoenix. He'd spent a lot of his childhood there, and he needed a change in his life; a drastic one. He left in December of 2011, and I helped him drive across the country. Just him, his dog Bonnie, and I, travelling 3 days worth of highways. We talked about me coming with him, and if we really planned to stay together for the rest of our lives. After many conversations, and a time span of almost a year of him already living in Arizona, I started preparation for my own move.
Leaving my hometown was probably one of the scariest, most dangerous, yet thrilling things I have ever dove into in my life. Thank God I have the best friend in the entire world, that would drive over 2,000 miles across the country with me, and also help with expenses. Without her, I am not quite sure how I would have made it here. She's helped me through so many things in my life, for years. Amara is the most helpful and caring friend I've got, and without her, I wouldn't be who I am today. OK, enough of the sappiness. ;)
I got three jobs within 2 weeks of being in Phoenix, and accepting two of them to work an average of 50 hours a week was pretty exhausting at first, but one was only seasonal, so that helped me push through. So, now I've got one job hosting at a restaurant, and I'm taking one class at a community college here...Calculus. Math is by far my favorite subject. It has been since elementary school. Though we are still just reviewing, I think I'll do alright in it; especially considering I only have ONE class to focus all of my attention into this semester.
Back to my hometown:
Even though it's not near the size of the Phoenix metropolitan area, I loved it there. It was all I knew. Before Vince decided on his move to Phoenix, I hadn't been farther than 3 hours away into South Carolina. It was safe to say I've lead a sheltered childhood. Thankfully, I don't blame anyone for it. It's just how many people born and raised in Fayetteville have seemed to live their lives. My mother and grandmother taught me all I needed to know; how I should treat others, how to care, how to do well in school. You name it, they lead me in the right direction. I saw friends come and go throughout my life because of simply living in a military town. I learned how to move on and find other people to hang out with and get to know. But one thing I didn't want happening when I moved was for people to do that same thing to me. I was determined to make relationships last, and not wither away...and so far, I've done a decent job. Striking up conversation with the friends and family I care for isn't too complicated every week or so. And for other friends, well, it was safe to say I knew who wouldn't put in the same effort back. That's completely fine though. Like the saying goes, "Some friend come into your life for a reason, others only come for a season." -Robby Ray.
I've been through a hell of a lot in my life, and there will absolutely be more to come, so don't forget to tune in to this City Girl's life.
:)
Leaving my hometown was probably one of the scariest, most dangerous, yet thrilling things I have ever dove into in my life. Thank God I have the best friend in the entire world, that would drive over 2,000 miles across the country with me, and also help with expenses. Without her, I am not quite sure how I would have made it here. She's helped me through so many things in my life, for years. Amara is the most helpful and caring friend I've got, and without her, I wouldn't be who I am today. OK, enough of the sappiness. ;)
I got three jobs within 2 weeks of being in Phoenix, and accepting two of them to work an average of 50 hours a week was pretty exhausting at first, but one was only seasonal, so that helped me push through. So, now I've got one job hosting at a restaurant, and I'm taking one class at a community college here...Calculus. Math is by far my favorite subject. It has been since elementary school. Though we are still just reviewing, I think I'll do alright in it; especially considering I only have ONE class to focus all of my attention into this semester.
Back to my hometown:
Even though it's not near the size of the Phoenix metropolitan area, I loved it there. It was all I knew. Before Vince decided on his move to Phoenix, I hadn't been farther than 3 hours away into South Carolina. It was safe to say I've lead a sheltered childhood. Thankfully, I don't blame anyone for it. It's just how many people born and raised in Fayetteville have seemed to live their lives. My mother and grandmother taught me all I needed to know; how I should treat others, how to care, how to do well in school. You name it, they lead me in the right direction. I saw friends come and go throughout my life because of simply living in a military town. I learned how to move on and find other people to hang out with and get to know. But one thing I didn't want happening when I moved was for people to do that same thing to me. I was determined to make relationships last, and not wither away...and so far, I've done a decent job. Striking up conversation with the friends and family I care for isn't too complicated every week or so. And for other friends, well, it was safe to say I knew who wouldn't put in the same effort back. That's completely fine though. Like the saying goes, "Some friend come into your life for a reason, others only come for a season." -Robby Ray.
I've been through a hell of a lot in my life, and there will absolutely be more to come, so don't forget to tune in to this City Girl's life.
:)
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
Life is a Maze
Everyone gets those moments when they just get upset for no absolute reason at all, right? That's how I feel right now. Sad, depressed, down, whatever you want to call it. Maybe I'm just tired. I sleep a lot at night, but it's never well; I toss and turn, take Bonnie out, wake from bad dreams...you name it, it's probably been happening to me. I shouldn't be so restless, though. It's not like my life is very difficult. Yes, I work around 30 hours per week, and I'm taking calculus this semester, but neither of those result in being overly stressed or anxious.
Oh, to be blogging again. I'm not sure how this will turn out, but I'm thinking it will be positive for me. A different sort of outlet to just let go in, and let my emotions run free. I'm positive my boyfriend will enjoy me being less emotional and moody. Moving over 2,000 miles away from home kind of does that to a girl though. I haven't hung out with anyone besides my boyfriend and his family since I've gotten here four months ago. Not that it's a bad thing, I love them all; however, variety in friends has always been soothing for me. Since high school I've always had plenty of friends. There's of course been the few extremely close ones, but having different groups of friends helps a person to let different emotions and feelings out in numerous places.
Talking to my mom and grandma almost every day helps me a lot, and them as well. Plus my best friend and I text almost constantly. We do have conflicting schedules at times, but we make it work. I wouldn't be able to make it through this big change in my life without those three ladies. They mean the world to me. But so does my boyfriend. Which is most of the reason why I'm so far away from my hometown. Don't get me wrong, I love everything about the west coast, that I've seen so far anyway, but without him coming here, I would have never known what it was like in the big city. Well, I may have known some day, but being here now feels right. Every single time I realize I'm here for good, I smile. It's so different here. Oddly, I don't usually miss home. Sure, I miss my family and friends, but not the place as much.
This new adventure is fascinating, and I love every moment of it. I love my job out here, I'm back in school, and I've got goals for my future. Our future. (I've got to try to think of "us," not just "me." But it's a hard concept for anyone to grasp.)
I feel better now. Calmer, anyhow. This is going to be a great way of expression.
Tune in for more in the crazy life I lead soon.
:)
Oh, to be blogging again. I'm not sure how this will turn out, but I'm thinking it will be positive for me. A different sort of outlet to just let go in, and let my emotions run free. I'm positive my boyfriend will enjoy me being less emotional and moody. Moving over 2,000 miles away from home kind of does that to a girl though. I haven't hung out with anyone besides my boyfriend and his family since I've gotten here four months ago. Not that it's a bad thing, I love them all; however, variety in friends has always been soothing for me. Since high school I've always had plenty of friends. There's of course been the few extremely close ones, but having different groups of friends helps a person to let different emotions and feelings out in numerous places.
Talking to my mom and grandma almost every day helps me a lot, and them as well. Plus my best friend and I text almost constantly. We do have conflicting schedules at times, but we make it work. I wouldn't be able to make it through this big change in my life without those three ladies. They mean the world to me. But so does my boyfriend. Which is most of the reason why I'm so far away from my hometown. Don't get me wrong, I love everything about the west coast, that I've seen so far anyway, but without him coming here, I would have never known what it was like in the big city. Well, I may have known some day, but being here now feels right. Every single time I realize I'm here for good, I smile. It's so different here. Oddly, I don't usually miss home. Sure, I miss my family and friends, but not the place as much.
This new adventure is fascinating, and I love every moment of it. I love my job out here, I'm back in school, and I've got goals for my future. Our future. (I've got to try to think of "us," not just "me." But it's a hard concept for anyone to grasp.)
I feel better now. Calmer, anyhow. This is going to be a great way of expression.
Tune in for more in the crazy life I lead soon.
:)
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